Consideration of others

[External Poster]

This posting is from: Aiko
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>>These people are incredibly self-centered and care not one iota
>>about anybody else. Unfortunately they tend to make a lot of
>>noise, figuratively and literally.

>After the remarks and lack of assist from these folks when I
>needed help BADLY, I will never volunteer for anything at
>DLV again.

I found the bantering between Joan and virtually the
rest of the attendees of DLV to be quite entertaining,
if not downright humorous.

However, with the posting from LeeAnna, I find that is
not humorous at all.

LeeAnna is a long time DLV organizer and volunteer in
very good standing. This negative incident toward
LeeAnna is caused by someone who is self centered,
selfish, and who basically ignored the feelings of
others.

If a violation of BDR results in losing a major
activity orgainzer, then I, for one, will go on the
offensive.

I felt the thread of "Joan vs. the world" would die
it's own slow death, but I feel that it's time to set
the record straight.

The BDR guidelines are in place for a reason. That
reason is to protect the 99% of the people that come
to DLV. The protection I'm referring to is from those
who want, what Annie calls, a "dressing free-for-all".

Diva Las Vegas is unique that there is no "safe" hotel
that is the center point of activity. There are safe
venues, but attendees still need to tavel to and from
their hotel, and should be presentable even during
this timeframe.

For DLV 2008, there should be even more mainstream
activities added, so the importance of BDR may be
stressed even more.

To make a long story short, there will be NO
relaxation of BDR during Diva Las Vegas.

If the BDR guidelines are not acceptable with you or
your expectations of DLV, then perhaps you should
consider another TG event, other than DLV.

I received numerous complaints concerning BDR during
DLV 2007. The overwhelming majority of these
complaints were about only two individuals.

Since the topic of BDR may affect the volunteer base,
I feel that it's part of my responsibility to try to
find a solution to those who violate the guidelines,
and to those who support those who violate the
guidelines.

One idea that has been discussed, is to assign a
"Special Big Sister". This is not part of Nora's Big
Sister program. This person will be assigned by the
Org group.

This Special Big Sister is for those people who are
the cause of complaints to Org. The Special Big
Sister would receive the complaints from Org, and
would be the initial contact to the violator.

In order to make sure the Special Big Sister has the
motivation to follow through with the counseling and
enforcement of BDR, any sanctions placed on the
violator would also be placed on the Special Big
Sister.

The Special Big Sister would need some special
qualities. That of being very forgiving, having
empathy, and have understanding that some people need
to have personal expression at the expense of others.

Joan, will you be volunteering for the Special Big
Sister position?


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(This posting was entered by Aiko, an external user of MyDLV.)

[External Poster]

This posting is from: annie
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>LeeAnna is a long time DLV organizer and volunteer in
>very good standing. This negative incident toward
>LeeAnna is caused by someone who is self centered,
>selfish, and who basically ignored the feelings of
>others.

>If a violation of BDR results in losing a major
>activity orgainzer, then I, for one, will go on the
>offensive.

LeeAnna, correct me if I'm wrong here, but I was under the
impression that those who p*ssed you off were not the ones
frequently noted for dress issues, but those who were not
cooperative at limo load-in time. Am I correct or incorrect
here?

Limo load-in was not fun this year. I got a lot of sh*t that
I didn't think I deserved, but in my case I gave it right back
with interest. One of those who got snotty with me did apologize
profusely to me at one of the limo stops. That was very much
appreciated.

>The BDR guidelines are in place for a reason. That
>reason is to protect the 99% of the people that come
>to DLV. The protection I'm referring to is from those
>who want, what Annie calls, a "dressing free-for-all".

I would state that the guidelines are there to protect that
99% from the consequences of that other 1% who wishes to have
their fun at the expense of those who want to behave appropriately.

>To make a long story short, there will be NO
>relaxation of BDR during Diva Las Vegas.

I really think that the majority are on the same page, wanting
the guidelines in place.

In the first iteration of survey feedback I asked for better ways
of implementing the guidelines. I have yet to hear anything.

Likewise, I suggested that those who didn't think things were
handled properly to volunteer to be the ones handling it.

Again, I have not seen any raised hands.

>Since the topic of BDR may affect the volunteer base,
>I feel that it's part of my responsibility to try to
>find a solution to those who violate the guidelines,
>and to those who support those who violate the
>guidelines.

I really think that it's the B part of BDR that jeopardizes the
volunteer situation, and this one case is not in any way related
to the incident that garnered far more than its fair share of
attention this year.


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(This posting was entered by annie, an external user of MyDLV.)

[External Poster]

This posting is from: Joan
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>I really think that it's the B part of BDR that jeopardizes the
>volunteer situation, and this one case is not in any way related
>to the incident that garnered far more than its fair share of
>attention this year.

I think that is true. By dressing androgynously I can use the
men's room with no problem. I'm not going to ruin my vacation
by having problems in the ladies room. I don't pass well
enough for that. Sincerely Joan, accepting who she is.


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(This posting was entered by Joan, an external user of MyDLV.)

[External Poster]

This posting is from: LeeAnna
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>LeeAnna, correct me if I'm wrong here, but I was under the
>impression that those who p*ssed you off were not the ones
>frequently noted for dress issues, but those who were not
>cooperative at limo load-in time. Am I correct or incorrect
>here?

Hi,

Yes, the group that really P*ssed me off was at the Limo load
area and through out the limo tour. It was their attitude and
not their dress or fashion since. In fact, the group was dressed
very nicely and were very fem in appearance, several of them
telling me the day before they had spent $35,000 in surgery to
look that nice. I guess money spent on looks does not help
the personality.

Annie did catch a lot of C*ap this year that was not her fault
and she did not deserve. I saw this first hand. I want to thank
Debbie, Val and Val's secret date from Salt Lake (handsome I
guess), and one other gal from the Salt Lake area, that I missed
the name of, for the help I did get.

I thought the burn from this would go away but it has stayed and
just will not fade away as quickly as I wanted it to. I am a big
girl and will be OK. As Annie pointed out, I will be missing next
years event do to me being out of the country during that time.

Take care everyone, LeeAnna


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(This posting was entered by LeeAnna, an external user of MyDLV.)

[External Poster]

This posting is from: annie
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>Yes, the group that really P*ssed me off was at the Limo load
>area and through out the limo tour. It was their attitude and
>not their dress or fashion since.
[munch]
>Annie did catch a lot of C*ap this year that was not her fault
>and she did not deserve. I saw this first hand. I want to thank

I really don't think that the DLV attendees realize that the
volunteers do take a certain amount of sh*t for their efforts. :(

I realize that those who bitch are in the minority, and that
the overwhelming majority of the attendees do appreciate the
volunteers' efforts.

And then we get a comment like "I feel like several do it for
ego boost and wear it like a badge" ... :(

I'm at a loss to explain this one, since I've seen it at other
events and I keep an eye out for it, but have yet to see it,
at DLV.

All I can figure out is that it may have been an isolated
incident, or somebody is projecting what they saw and felt at
other events onto the DLV volunteers, who are very much down
to earth. (If I'm blind to something here, somebody please
whack me with the clue-by-four!)

It's unfortunate, but volunteers, in DLV and elsewhere, are
often unthanked or underthanked, and in some cases $$$ poorer
for their efforts.


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(This posting was entered by annie, an external user of MyDLV.)